My Story @ Tarragon
Claire Calnan
The first time I worked at Tarragon was in 2006 when I played Albertine’s sister Madeleine in Past Perfect. I was thrilled to be working on Tremblay with such an illustrious group of artists, led by the incomparable Leah Cherniak. I was also thrilled to have my first job at the Tarragon as it was for me (and I am sure I am not alone here) an important moment in my young career.
A few days after we opened I started to feel a little unwell. I plied myself with vitamins and juice and soup and good thoughts and crossed my fingers with determination. But a few days later I walked on stage to confront my sister Albertine, played by Caroline Cave, and when I opened my mouth to speak — nothing came out. I cleared my throat and tried again. Nothing.
I worked vigorously at swallowing as my heart started to pound and I searched about, trying to figure out what to do next. I spotted the pot of tea that Caroline drank on stage throughout the show and made a beeline for it, poured myself a cup and downed it. With this, I found I had enough voice to make it through the scene.
That was the first day of my struggle with a debilitating flu that set into motion a challenging few weeks.
But, happily, what I remember best from this experience, aside from the snot and nausea, was the great kindness shown to me by the people working on the show and the staff at the theatre. The stage management team planted glasses of water and tea throughout the backstage area and in nooks close to my entry point, where I could access a sip with relative ease if I ever found myself voiceless again. They bought loads of tissues that I stuffed up the sleeves of my costume and they let me skip curtain calls on two-show days so I could sleep.
Throughout this time, various members of the staff would come by to check in on me, and offer support and care where they could. Richard Rose stopped in regularly and once I found a lovely note from Mallory Gilbert on my dressing table, encouraging me to ‘hang in there’.
I didn’t know how important those gestures were until I received them. Tarragon had been an important place to me since I began my relationship to theatre in high school but this fact only served to heighten my feelings of regret for being so incapacitated as I debuted on its stage. It was a delightful surprise to discover that the Tarragon, aside from its tremendous professional reputation, was also a place with a great sense of warmth, humanity and heart.
(Later, I passed the flu bug to both Caroline and Nancy Beatty, effectively taking down all of the female cast members. That is not such a good memory. But…somehow…essential to include for the lesson it teaches us: Never Drink from Another Actor’s Tea Cup.)
Claire Calnan is currently appearing in The Clockmaker. She is the co-Artistic Director of The AMY Project (Artists Mentoring Youth) and tiny bird theatre. She is a recipient of a 2010 Chalmers Professional Development Grant, a graduate of Studio 58 and an active Toronto theatre artist who works extensively in creation based performance.
Tell us all about it at tarragontheatre.com/mystory.